And so the process
starts to bite – take hold and even though it is only 34 days it is
making a difference
The run up was a little
nerve racking – would I remember my lines would I be OK? but I now
realise that it is basically a formality - as long as you are most
the way there and are seen to be making an effort to get there then
you will do fine.
So today it starts to
sink in – my mind is beginning to slow to settle to “cool” -
impercepterble to most but it is happening – I can feel it
The process of life is
popping out at me in many places – the footbath full of tad poles,
the water dripping after a light rain fall in the afternoon. Getting
up before dawn and washing is becoming almost automatic – the phone
broke but I find my self waking at the time the alarm was set and
ease into going down and mindfully showering and shaving – feeling
the water as its coldness awakens the body – and taking time to
shave in the dark sound bath of the tropical outside bathrooms.
The first weeks were a
little chaotic with 13 young boys going through their initiation –
a buddhist boot camp for their summer holiday – These boys became
wonderful teachers even though I didnt realise until a week or so
ago.
The young lads
impressed me with their eager enthusiasm to learn all the words for
the morning and evening chants by heart and their ability to get it
in one reading – or appearing to get it quickly – they soon bored
and started horse playing which was no major suprise – I had
expected this from boys so young but when one ot he elder lads
started to show his cockyness and quite brutally punched a young boy
maybe 4 or 6 years his junior in puplic I had to let rip - “come on
you little shit- if you want to punch someone punch me” was what I
wanted to say but unfortunately – or fortunately , my Thai wasn't
up to scratch and I came over a lot cooler than I actually felt. This
incident happened whilst we were in Phuket and I would have been a
bit more calm about it if I hadn't witnessed him kicking another
lad as he was trying to get to sleep.
So many distractions –
The russian and his wife who ended up trying to sort out their
relationship over the kitchen table and revolted when I passed on the
concerns of a local woman who was worried by what she had heard the
other local women saying … regarding this foregn monk talking to
that foreign woman in the kitchen all the time – It ended up with
him telling me (quite abruptly which was partly what the Thai woman
had complained about) that I didnt follow the rules properly either,
which I already knew: I held my tongue , “Dont shoot me I am only
the messenger” faded into a hazy fog of thoughts about what I was
doing myself, feeling relieved that I had come quite resolved to
being a single celibate individual , here to concentrate on
developing my meditation practice.
The seasoned monks
brough in to train us all seemed so laid back – at first I thought
this is going to go badly wrong but my concerns were misplaced and
everything was managed with a cool calm reservation that is almost
bizzare to observe – Phuket was a slight shock to the system in it
seemed a little haphazThen a week after the Phuket trip the Burmese
stupa was commisioned – hundreds of Burmese people and a dozen or
so Burmese monks flocked to the new Chedai that was nearing
completion – Again taken in its stride with little fuss or fluster
– Boon did get a little disturbed having to run around with keys
all the time but then I could understand this after 7 years as a
novice he was preparing for his own full ordination and had to
caretake while the abbot was away AND he has 10 kids to look after –
as a 20 year old I have to admit I was impressed at his calm maturity
in the matters even if I did think he was taking the easy way out
with the bully. But this is one way the bully became a teacher for me
– It is his loss his bad karma – why should I worry – he will
get his wake up call when he is called on to prove himself as a man
without having younger boys to take his frustrations out on, and the
younger boys learnt to – dont antagonise him was the advice I ended
up giving them there were lessons to be learn all round.
And so in the hubbub of
all the Burmese I get my own first baptism – A visa run. Well Steve
had said he was going to Penang and the Russian had told me he had
been given the OK to go on a visa run in plain clothes. I thought
about the option for a very short moment – not really an option for
me I had come and was commited to being robed (this had been drilled
in on day two when I put on some shorts to go and was and had been
gently reprimanded for not wearing my sarong at all times)
I quickly decided that
although a visa run to Penang would be easier and offer the option of
a more secure two month Visa that maybe discretion would be the
better part of valour and I should go to the Club Andaman Casino near
Ranong on the Burmese border Island. Steve confirmed this as the best
choice with the question “Will you be wearing robes in Penang?”
- Yep I'll be wearing robes and carry a big placard saying foreign
monk so the Malaysians would have an easy target to blow up
It is only when you get
to test situations you do the research and I learnt that despite the
lack of press coverage the number of deaths in HadYai and the
southern provinces are suprisingly high due to the territorial
disputes going on there.
I opted to go to Ranong
and the tickets were arranged. 8:30 Lompraya to Chumphon where the
12:00 mini bus runs over to Club Andaman – a one hour turn around
and back to Chumphon for 7:00 – leave the Fame Tours Bar at 9:00
to get the night boat to Koh Tao arriving at 5:00 in the morning –
just intime to catch the local monk getting up. Plans were made and
implemented.
I waited for the others
to get back from bindibat and raided the food for what I thought
would be enough to eat for the day – some baton-go sticky rice and
bananas were huridly put in a bag and I rushed off for the Catamaran
trip that stopped at Koh Tao but rushed on to Chumphon – I was
taken up to the airconditioned VIP room but it was full of Japanese
tourists and so had to sit on a shaded part of the deck. Monks have a
strange social position in Thailand and it felt quite odd being out
in the “real” world and being wai'd to and put in priviledged
seat – I constantly reminded myself that it was the robes and what
they represent that were being respected not the farang buffoon
inside them. I still felt a little embarrased reading the signs
saying no food and only food purchased on board to be eaten but the
stewards walking by with hardly a glance alieviated my self
consiousness to a level where I thought well the foreigners dont have
a clue anyways so why worry about what they think.
The rendevous with the
bus at Chumphon pier was fine and the trip was much more picturesque
than I had expected – I made a mental note to wai to the two large
Buddha images I saw en-route on the return trip and was surprised by
how friendly if somewhat puzzled the immigration staff and boat staff
at the andaman club pier were. I was called aside to be told and
though I was going to get the usual immigration run around but was
told that I could sort out a longer term visa at Samui – the bus
driver even took the trouble to hand my passport to the female
immigration officer that processed me on the way out. The wait at the
pier was entertained by watching a Thai man dredging the mud sands
that formed the shore – he seemed happy as a sandboy.
At the
andaman club I was a little dissapointd to get to the Burmese
immigration to again have my passport handed to the young lady
immigration officer and then be told I had been stamped out as awll
as into Burmah and so had no need to go to the casino as I could
catch the bus back. Never a big gambler I was a little sad not to get
to see the actual Casino itself due to some unfinished business from
7 or 8 years back. So we wandered back to the boat pier after
briefly watching the monkeys on the beach and waited. When we got
back to Thailand the process was even easier and after being checked
back in the bus driver helped me re-arrange my robes and then we
headed back to Chumphon.
At Chumphon Fame Tours
seemed slightly surprised – Well used to dealing with travel doped
farang the receptionist seemed to be hesitant talking to this monk
that happened to be farang who had wandered in to book a night boat.
Not sure how to take payment she soon relaxed and brought me water to
drink when I asked if I could sit and wait in the restaurant. A few
cups of tea later and the mini bus took us to the pier and my
air-conditioned bunk (surrounded by women).
Arrival in Koh Tao was
at 5:00 am still dark I managed to walk to the local temple without
being hassled by Taxi touts and the usual sales pressures. As I
appoached the old monks kuti I stopped and hesitated – there was a
light on but I didn't want to disturb him and I didnt know his moring
rituals. I hesitated and spotted a chair with his alms bowl on it –
though he doesnt use it as he can hardly walk , only managing a few
steps with the aid of a zimmer frame. I cant of been standing there
more than two or three seconds when his voice came out of his room -
“Mr David... how are you?”, smiled there was no way of knowing
how he could tell it was me out side... . I sat with him and enjoyed
a breakfast and discussed some of the simpler issues with my
circumstance regarding being in Thailand , Visa and my ordination –
he wasnt surprised when my answer to his question, “how long you
ordain?” was “I don't know, … all my life maybe” his response
was “good,good,good”. After settling there a while he told me to
go out to a tree near buy and pick up a windfall mango, I did as
intracted only to be told to look on the roof too, the two mangoes
looked quite unready to eat but he gathered together a bowl and a
knife and instructed me to peel and de stone the fruit. It looked
unready but I complied the flesh was quite hard and white – this is
what I would expect to see sliced into strips in a papaya salad and I
expected it to be quite tart to taste. I was surprised and that will
always be one of my most memorable breakfasts till I die. A 9:00
walk to my lunch appointment was punctuated as I dropped in at the
local police station – The main local police officer is on first
name terms with me so I thought it polite to drop in and show my
change in direction. When he saw me he smiled and said “really” -
we chatted for half an hour and he ended up suggesting the old monks
idea of me coming to stay on the island was a good one - “the
farang dont understand buddha they just come and get drunk, many
problem...” I paid my respects and promised to think about the idea
and wandered on my way. I bumped into one or two people but and
called into see a dive shop manager as promised but he was late so I
ended up chatting with his boss for a while and then continued on
only to be stopped and ordered to accept a lift from the local boat
captain I knew as P'dong – where?? - I went to see his wife but she
was occupied so I wandered down to the bowling mini golf and waited.
It felt a little
strange being some where that had been a bit of a “safety stop”
for me for quite a while.
My friendship with
Steve the owner has grown over the years and I feel quite are ease
and see the Hacienda as an escape from the stress and strife of
living in Thailand – so it was odd to be here as a monk. I felt
quite self conscious arriving but after washing up soon settled in,
switched on the computer to catch up with my email and facebook and
waited.
Tun soon turned up to
cook my “lunch” and she seemed quite pleased to see me in robes.
Lunch duly turned up and my first blessing was a little under
standard – Tun said not to worry but in the back of my mind I hoped
I wasn't going to be to blame for any bad events during the day or
coming week.
Lunc had I wandered
back down to Dive Point where Frank met me and after some tea and a
chat he escorted me to the ferry where Sahat from Hin Wong seemed
very happy with a big smile he took my ticket and said ooooooh.
The lomprayah back to
Koh Phangan was un-eventful the VIP room was empty so I was escorted
there – the taxi back to the temple had to wait and seemed a little
appologetic for having to charge me full price but I was quite
content – I had another 30 days and felt pleased to be back home.
So... what did I learn
in one month – well it is difficult to say really – I have
improved my sitting and meditation practice though I still have a
long way to go until I can get into half lotus.
I have adapted to life
in the temple relatively easily but find the novice boys a
distraction – lesson learnt to be more tolerant and allow them to
develop their own self discipline as this seems to be the way the
monks encourage them to learn – whilst stopping some petty bullying
I learnt to be less judgemental and to “mind my own business”,
by that I mean to look at my own response and now relate with the
underdog and get annoyed – dont get annoyed is the key point.
Structure and lack of structure is another lesson. Going to Ranong
was humbling and made me realise the people that Wai and bow and
present offerings need to be respected – it isnt me but the robes
and what they represent that is being praised – very humbling, and
pressing the point that I have to live up to standard home even more.
